ready or not: a moment of reflection

funny how life seems to sneak up on you sometimes. everything seems to fly by so fast it's hard to even catch a breathe. lately i've been thinking that i grew up way too fast. i was so eager to act like the college town party girl, i missed out on all the opportunities i had to act my age. years went by when i was pretending to be 21. being the party girl has made so many good memories for me but at the same time i feel like it completely wasted by childhood. well, i started acting this way around 13. yeah, messed up, i know. of course, i went to my first part at 14 and lost my virginity at 16. like so many things, my life has become so bittersweet. knowing you can't turn back the hands of time and recapture things you missed out on -- bitter. having courage and self-esteem to go with a spirit that's hard to break -- sweet. the life of cassandra turner has been a ride worth taking. i have amazing friends and i can finally look in the mirror and see someone who i'm proud to be. i know that i missed chances and paths to take, but regret is the only friend that will ever make you feel alone. so while i'm disappointed in myself for growing up way too soon, i'm also proud of who i am today. while there will always be things in your past who wish had gone according to plan, i've found that there's one rule that she be left unbroken. don't look back.

fish gotta swim, bird gotta fly

cassandra gotta party. yes, there's a party this weekend and you can count me in! as the title may suggest, i am the resident part girl. it should be a good one. beach houses are always the best and this one is at a beach house. PLUS it's a kingsley party. the kingsley's are like mucho rich and they have a party boy son. score! so yes, i will be going to an insanely fabulous party this weekend. hence forth the good mood! anyway, i also made another fabulous progression. i'm 100% over my edward cullen fantasy. i couldn't read the books because i thought they sucked so hard, but i used to think that rob pattinson was mucho hot. now he just really annoys me. he was seriously on that 100 hottest stars thing? HA! i can think of 100 people way hotter than him! so now i am totally over edward cullen and rob pattinson. suck it, bicthes! also i must add a few more things. why is there a picture of a pikachu? because pikachu is one of the cutest things ever to grace this earth, that's why! seriously, i never understood pokemon, but this baby's a looker. and the last thing. why do i keep saying mucho? because it's in homage to my lover friend, christine! actually, she's my cousin, but she's awesome. i want her in my possi, but there's some unwritten code for cliquing in panamah and one the them is that you have to stay in your grade. and she's a sophomore and i'm a junior. well, well. unwritten is just like imaginary if you ask me. we'll just see what we can do. *wink*

boys will be boys, girls will be girls

so lately i've been trying to help my baby sister belle with her guy troubles. she's so cute and charming and she doesn't even realize it. she's kinda head over heels for one of her models so i've been trying to help her charm him without making it way too obvious. yes, i will admit, i'm not big on commitment when it comes to guys but i'm always happy to help my chickas commit to guys if they want. i won't say belle's crushes name, but they're pretty good friends (not like meerew freaky good friends) so opportunity is all around her. i wanted to set them up on the date and then she could just say that her sister is crazy and thinks they make a cute couple. which is totally true! and he's a nice guy, i think he'd be good even if he wasn't sure he wanted to go. so yeah, i have your weekend planned, belle. meena has her guy choice really really clear, nicole thinks the male race is retarded, kelly loves music more than she will ever love any guy, emily's too new for me to know what type she likes and ophelia is more into her studies than her guys. so belle is code red priority 1! i think a lot of people under appreciate their sibs so i've gotta be super sweet to belle. meena has her bro jensen. kelly has her sis brianna. emily has her bro chris. and ophelia has her bro nick. andrew has amy and alaina. colton has lydia. their are a lot of famous panama sibs come to think of it. but the solos (meena and jensen) and the kebraras (andrew, amy, alaina) are the most famous. i want YOU to get up right now and give your sib a hug! GO!

starving for drama!! x]

panamah has been really boring and anti-climatic lately! for being a school dramatic enough for gossip queens to start a blog updating the web on all the crazy things going on, where's the drama folks? the little black notebook always say "drama; they can say they hate it but they create it" so i guess we listened and maybe just to spite sunday and helen we stopped being drama whores! but i'm still a drama whore. i want drama! anyway, i was thinking about changing the layout of the blog. i've had it for soooo long... it's so boring! so expect a new layout and maybe a mixpod. yeah, i love those things and all my friends are making me jealous because they have them. i'll have to post something very soon when i actually have something to say. pssh. and i promise there will be no more hot american idol contestants sucking face! unless there were pictures of kris allen and megan joy making out. sorry, but they're always standing next to each other and they make a pretty obnoxiously sweet couple lol. try to post soon and you should be seeing a new layout and a mixpod very soon! byeeee!

i'm sorry i crossed a line

~in response to until there was THESE: a perverted post~

i'm sorry everyone about that last post. hopefully not everyone had to see it. i took it down. please forgive me :[

i'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorryi'm sorry

i crossed a line. it won't happen again. don't be mad at me kelly and carrie!!!

summer time and the living is easy

i have nothing to post about so i'm going to back track and tell you about my vacation to palm beach, florida this summer! yay! my the grandparents on my mom's side live there so this summer we went to go visit them! this is their house. cute, huh? well i thought it was gonna be a drag but it was actually pretty cool.
our grandpa phillip let us go on his boat! awesome ride! and there were these cute boys in a boat going past us. ok, yes. when my mom wasn't watching i totally lifted my bikini top. she was confused why they hollered but i reverted to the wall of silence. lol. belle didn't see either but maybe as she's reading this it's all coming to together. lol.
the next day we went on this cruise ship which was AWESOME! we were on it like all day. they even let me and belle up in the front. it was so cool. but so hot! i was wearing my bathing suit under that shirt all day... and we saw a few of the guys on the boat that passed us yesterday. but only one of them recognized me. justin was his name. nice guy. great kisser. lol! yes of course i made out with him! it was sunset and he was cute and i looked hot and you know how it goes! lmao!

and the next day we went home. so sad, but i'm glad i was back at home i guess. but i wasn't the only one with a great summer, huh andrew?!?! make sure to bug him about that for me, ok? lol! summer is usually great for me and my friends. i encourage the following to post about their 2008 summer vacations!

• meena
• kelly
• nicole
• andrew
• belle
• jensen

all their names are links to their blogs. check them out soon to see if they posted but give them some time first! lol. love all you guys. even you andrew! even though i was really pissed off at you a few posts ago. and you guys don't have to post about your 2008 summer. i'll just cry if you don't. lol.

panamah ink

many of you have probably already heard, but one my my best friends meena and my guy friend andrew are getting tattooed next week! i'm so psyched! if i wasn't totally obsessed with them as a romantic pairing, than i would totally go and get the saving abel tattoo i want! yes, yes, bad judgment, blah, blah, blah. but i still want it! kelly said a while ago she wanted to get ivy tattooed around her ankle. maybe we should go! maybe ink will be the new panamah trend. hmm... again, only may obsession with meerew (meena and andrew) is keeping me from either going with them to get my saving abel tattoo or video taping it to put it on youtube. lmao! meena might have skipped over the fact that since andrew is getting a sleeve, he has to take off his shirt to get it done. and she should know that he probably looks pretty good without his shirt on. lol. oh meerew... and we should totally talk about this girl bonding ink, kelly! lol. just kidding! or am i? lol!

the fabulous surealism of movies & manga

i was reading some mangas online last night because i couldn't sleep and it made me realize the same way in which almost all manga romance scenes happen. the guy always kisses the girl and the girl is always like "oh me, oh my. is this really happening??" but in real life it's the girl who always comes down hard on the guy and the guy who plays hard to get. it makes it hard for girls, you know? you could be leaning onto a guy, picking at his shirt, giving him puppy dog eyes and rest your head on his chest and he'd be the one who looked scared to death! guys never lead the girls on anymore. how sad... i've been with a lot of guys and truthfully not many of them more than flings or one nighters but the girls are always leading the guy on! what's with that? maybe it's different is japan, but it sure seems that way in movies, too. even the guys that you think are like walking hormones freeze in the bedroom. maybe i've been with too many inexprinenced guys but i mean really! do us girls have to do all the work? lol.

the drum beat of my angry song

i'm so sick of this! i'm so pissed off at my friend, i could spit! he's been acting like such a jerk! i mean we were never really like tight like best friends, but we were friends enough! i'm so sick of him trying to drum up sympathy for himself and then being all like "leave me alone!" he needs to get his freakin' act together before i freakin' punch him in the face! all my friends probably know who i'm talking about but i'll keep it confidential for all the readers who don't know either of us. but no joke, i wanna punch him across the face and just say "get it together!!" but if i really do punch him, i'm sure you'll hear the tale-- names and all-- on Fast Times At Panamah High. a part of me just really thinks he wants attention and another part of me is seriously his friend. just come on and get your act together anonymous friend! i bet a bunch of your friends might be thinking the same thing! we know you can do it, so DO IT!

PS: you see, i always listen to Simple Plan when i'm mad and right now this certain friend is the reason for it. so he's like the drum beat. you know?

cyber tag!

(see number 12 for details on the pic) so apparently there's a really long game of cyber tag going on. like someone will say they "tagged you" and you have to write as many random facts as years old. like i'm 16 so i have to write 16 random facts about myself. well, here it goes!

1. i really hate the sound of chalk
2. i have a tendency to start trouble by spreading misinterpreted messages.
3. i really hate veggies
4. my mom was a french exchange student to the school i'm going to
5. my dad used to be in a band with my best friend's dad
6. i can't draw to save my life
7. i'm an awful speller
8. i drive a silver punch bug which was my dream car when i was little
9. i love babies
10. i really hate soul and jazz music
11. i used to do ballet when i was little and dreamed of being a ballerina
12. i was a puppy for halloween when i was 6 and i would wear it around the house and pretend to be a dog
13. i have scrambled eggs for breakfast every morning before a big test
14. i have a scar on my shoulder from when i fell on a hangar
15. i got drunk at a party and made out with my cousin (we were so drunk we actually forgot we were related XP)
    
16. i won a junior talent competition with my sister belle when i was 11

number 15 is really embarrassing, i know! well i don't really know who to tag... um...

• chelsie
• belle
• nicole
• lydia

i would tag andrew but his blog isn't personal like that. see you next time! ciao!

spring flowers & confessions cast

so i couldn't help but notice that now a bunch of kids at school have blogger accounts. and a bunch of them are making blogs! which is no problem to me! including my sister belle is launching her clothing line blog! hooray! anyway, it seems kinda weird that there's assorted "popular kids" within the people talked about on fast times at panamah high. because aren't the people mentioned in the blog ALL popular kids?? just saying... and i was reading confessions of a broken heart last night and i couldn't help but notice AGAIN. the sidebar of characters in the story keeps getting bigger and bigger! and he keeps adding GIRLS! how does a pretty guy-ish guy keep up with 6 girl characters??? i can't predict what guys would do! but andrew's a writer, maybe he has some worldly skill... and that thing he had up about "haunts" was CREEPY! it was like WHOA! i dunno. you'll have to read it next time it goes up because my grandma would sit up in her grave if andrew didn't put that cryptic suicide note back on the his blog.

emo!!!1

whoa. ok, so here i am, at school this morning. normal locker
talk. but when i take a step back i see
meena's best guy friend, andrew (he sometimes hangs out with us to see meena), kelly, and nicole. i thought "wow!" why? we're what you would call the popular kids in school and andrew, kelly, and nicole are EMO! kelly has this whole has every emo album ever put out, depressing drawings, "don't forget to smile", Peyton Sawyer vibe. nicole has the whole weird up bringing, doesn't know much about her past vibe. and Andrew... well i made him take the emo quiz and he got a HIGH score! and watching him fill it out was like being on the other end of a suicide hot line! and scoping Confessions Of A Broken Heart and A Story In My Twists i was like "wow!" SIMT: emo banner, black and pink, depressing life portrayed. COABH: i can't even begin to describe! i've gotta ask meena what andrew looked like when he was younger. and none of us really knew nicole until high school. kelly doesn't have a blog, but the inside of her room is proof enough! i dunno why so many of my friends are so dark. i didn't really know andrew until high school when meena introduced me to him. meena has banned me from seducing him though. no worries, andrew!

ladies and gentlefriends!

hey babies!

so if you go to my school you prolly already know me. but if not...

i'm cassandra. i have 1 sister named belle and the coolest friends (gotta love 'em!)

this is basically a blog for my thoughts. and if you don't wanna hear what a got to say stop reading

with that outta the way. i just wanna say...

HOLLA!!

to all my lady friends out there! even when i'm mean to you because you always seem to find great guys and i'm a one night girlie, i still love you! Y

now what was i saying...

me and my girlies are having an i never party on friday. and i don't mean the lame ass card game. i mean

the real deal

boom! i'll tell you how it goes. or maybe keep it confidential.

like so many things it depends on my MOOD

yeah my mood! you heard me!

and then of course there's the HUGE party.

in which i will find a man, man! or not...

PEACE!

the princess ducky herself (that's ME)